My solar goddess? ...... Whatever, also OK. I said it doesn't matter how I call u.

When the dial is unable to make a connection, when the message can't get to its destination, I feel like I get nothin' when I am reachin' out, or no one can hear me when I am screamin' out.

But that's ok, I feel so good cos I know that sometimes EL SOL is far to reach. However, I am just afraid that something bad happens. But, no, I believe that nothing's goin' wrong.

Recently, I seem to have good mood, and I know that I can see sunlight comin' from out of the window tomorrow, yes, tomorrow......

I really doubt whether the title is correct, cos I only turned to an on-line dictionary, though I spent much time.

最近感觉好了很多，身体和精神上的。生活很简单，但也真的挺开心，每天似乎只有3件主要的事，睡觉、写稿，然后缠住mi diosa solar，但这就足够了。

Mi diosa solar, 你可以把她当作虚构的一个人物，甚至more than人，因为她是我需要的goddess，她也许存在或不存在，but I believe that she's already there......

Sometimes I believe that I really need mi diosa solar to light the darkness in my life.但事实上，不开心的日子总是会过去的。

日子终归是简单的，简单的日子总带着那么一点无聊，你或我的日子都是这样，每天如重复着涂格子一般。so I plead and pray, I need mi diosa solar to make days simple but happy, simply happy......

I want the sun. Look at it, look how it shines for me...

And catch the yellow sunlight in my hands to fill the emptiness inside the simple days...

我真的很容易满足，简单的，我就已经感到很开心。我已经觉得这是我对我最大的恩赐...from mi diosa solar...

I need someone to be mi diosa solar...

I call you mi diosa solar, and I hope you really are, for long, for ever......

I know that I'd better get on my knees and pray

cos I am really afraid that someday you would walk away

"Don't go away, say what you say, say that you'll stay, forever and a day......"

In fact, it doesn't matter if the phrase "mi diosa solar" is correct or not. It doesn't matter how I call you. They don't matter.

Mi diosa solar, you can bring me YELLOW sunlight and simply happiness, and I plead......

最后，希望你能click一下播放器让它从头播放这首你熟悉或不熟悉的yellow...

 

YELLOW_coldplay

 

Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah, they were all yellow.
I came along,
I wrote a song for you,
And all the things you do,
And it was called "Yellow."
So then I took my turn,
Oh what a thing to have done,
And it was all "Yellow."
Your skin
Oh yeah, your skin and bones,
Turn into something beautiful,
D'You know, you know I love you so,
You know I love you so.
I swam across,
I jumped across for you,
Oh what a thing to do.
Cos you were all "Yellow,"
I drew a line,
I drew a line for you,
Oh what a thing to do,
And it was all "Yellow."
Your skin,
Oh yeah your skin and bones,
Turn into something beautiful,
And you know for you,
I'd bleed myself dry,

for you, I'd bleed myself dry.
It's true, look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine for,
Look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine.
Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And all the things that you do.

JJ，昨晚我写完稿后睡不着，于是决定听听Radio。其实听了没多久，但恰巧收获了以下两个大家似乎都懂，但还是要听人说出来的道理。

有这样一部电影。男女主角是同居的情侣，女的一直想男的亲自做一顿丰盛的晚餐，但男的对这些琐碎的家务活十分反感。在没有饭吃的时候，男主角永远只会用汽水和饼干打发掉。事实上他们两个也经常为这些事而争得不可开交，例如女主角叫男主角购物时顺便买12个柠檬回来，男主角只买回3个。女主角大为不满，不料男主角也大发雷霆，说：“早知道你那么在意柠檬，我买100个回来！”后来女主角决定要分手，在搬出去当晚，她看见男主角一个人静静坐在点着蜡烛的餐桌前，餐桌上是精致而丰盛的西餐......

如果按照老套的电影情节，一定是hug, kiss之类的结尾，但那确实只是电影罢了，而我们也不需要对这部电影的结局太在意了。我们该在意的是，现实呢？现实里，诸多的问题表明了两个人的不合适和差异，那些都不是一顿晚餐就能够解决的问题。如果女主角没有离开，待到日子恢复平静后，谁能保证男主角不会回到以前那种casual的生活中？那样的他才是真正的他，脱离身边的整个环境想要改变一个人，never!所以只有女主角选择了心痛地离开，这才会是一部获奖电影的结局。

后来又听到一个比喻，说一只猴子被迫从一棵它很喜欢的果树上下来了，它感到很伤感，因为它以后无法再回到那棵果树上了。虽然还是很喜欢那棵果树，但是它却获得了一个机会，去发现原来会有其它的果树更加吸引它、更加美味的果子会使它感到更开心。其实在生活中，对待事业、感情都应该抱这样一种态度。现在的社会，一个人有了工作，开心抑或不开心，都难免抱一种“安居乐业”的心态不舍得辞职。但假如公司倒闭了，却会有相当一部分人能够有机会去发现更好的路。对待感情，乐观些，也这样想吧。

JJ，其实不是特意要说给你听，但我确实觉得，在现在，需要对待前途和感情的问题时，你可以将此当一些无聊的short stories或是有用的启发，whatever......

最近，我又回到Oasis的音乐中了

 

Who kicked a hole in the sky,
so the heavens would cry over me?
Who stole the soul from the sun
and the world come undone at the seams?

 

已经连续病了好几天，某人说我是被龟传染的禽流感。一直以来都晕乎乎的，昨天随着暴风雨而“病入膏肓”，于是终于舍得放下工作，少写了一晚稿。今天出太阳了，病也似乎好了很多。

午饭后，我娘“抽起条筋”说要吃雪糕，我只好受命跑到楼下K仔买。到了楼下，驻足于机关幼儿园门前，看着当年的母校。虽然不能进去，但是也很久没有这样细细看过这装载着无数童年回忆的地方了，有苦也有乐，虽然对某人而言那似乎都很“乐”。

看了良久，才发现那条可以取代楼梯的滑梯大概只有7、8米长，想当年放学，我只要从上面滑下来就可以了，不需要走楼梯，但那时却觉得它足有1公里长。

忽然脑海中闪烁过一些如同“神话故事”般的情景，幼儿园和人争女孩、跳舞表演时耍大牌拒不上场，难免有些得意。

买回雪糕后要陪阿婆走楼梯，年迈的阿婆已很少出门，以往走楼梯也走到楼底，现在只走到2楼便折返了。被某人认为很搞笑的阿婆今天又发作了，一边走楼梯一边暴粗，让我一边吃着雪糕一边汗颜......

待会还得过去拜访大伯，很久没去过了。沿途还得经过车站和中心医院这两个以前并没有怎么关注过的地方。

今天过得还算舒适和充实的，如果我哪一天“抽起条筋”，也许会去寻找一下飞鹅岭上那传说中有着盘旋楼梯的幼儿园......